UNHAPPY SHOPPER bought a Victrola
A TALE OF TWO SHOPPERS:
a Cautionary Fable, BUT YOU CAN create
A HAPPY ENDING!
UNHAPPY SHOPPER bought a Victrola
Through an online AUCTION to save some moola.
The pictures were fuzzy, or contrived to hide
All the problems that lurked inside!
HAPPY SHOPPER found phonophan
And everything went according to plan.
The pictures were clear, with clear explanations.
For your questions we have infinite patience.
UNHAPPY SHOPPER got a wreck in the mail.
The Victrola was damaged when the packing failed.
The seller packed groceries in a shopping mall --
About packing Victrolas he knew nothing at all!
HAPPY SHOPPER received a prize!
A veritable phonograph feast for the eyes.
It arrived in perfect condition, too --
Phonophan has the experts who know what to do.
UNHAPPY SHOPPER had reality shock --
AUCTION sellers are NO VALUE, ALL TALK.
The motor was missing an important spring.
Said the seller, "I don't know nothing about them things."
So to YOU, dear shopper, we pose this query --
Will you take a RISK, or will you buy fearlessly?
Will you be the butt of an AUCTION SCAM?
Or will you buy with CONFIDENCE from PHONOPHAN?
We received this e-mail from M.C. in NY:
"I bought a victrola from another victrola vendor. He said in his webpage that he cleaned and lubricated the motors and cleaned the cabinets of all the victrolas he sold... The finish and cabinet was O.K with only a few minor dings. Then when I looked inside of the cabinet there was a huge chunk of wood missing out of the inner motor board trim... I should have gone to you first. I know that if I did I would have gotten a top notch quality victrola that I would have been proud of."
